I have probably written more in my doctoral studies about finding better rhythms of life than on any other topic (aside from my dissertation, but that is for another time). Yet, here we are again in the throes of the hustle with the relentless and incessant stream of noise, notifications, and the nagging notion that we are missing out on something. Living in Southern California is a pace of life that was not sustainable. We both took jobs in San Diego and planned to figure out how to make a life for ourselves. Things did not go as planned. Our son was diagnosed with a severe immunocompromised condition that involved a lot of testing to rule out scary things. There were really hard moments as test after test was done, but thankfully we continued to receive good reports.

Our time in SD was short-lived. In that moment, we were exhausted. We were grieved. It was as if some sort of fracture took place in the soul, the type that only comes when great longing is met with defeat. It is that feeling musicians know well we are waiting for the chord to resolve…

If you are anything like me, you can easily entertain yourself in the car by having conversations with yourself. I recall a time in undergrad when I set off on a solo road trip from Azusa, CA, to Atascadero, San Francisco, Fresno, and back. I remember that trip over ten years ago, but I don’t recall getting bored. Sure – long stretches of “The 5” certainly require stops for coffee, but from music and conversations in my mind—often coming up with a snarky comeback weeks after the fact. Have you been there?

I recently had one of those in-my-head conversations and was thinking about what I might say to a friend asking about our recent move and all the questions that come with transition. I imagined them asking, “sure is a different pace of life there, isn’t it?” As I sat at one of the three stop lights in our town, I had a realization. This season is not like the others I have written about. This is not a change of pace but a whole new way of being.

I think that is the call of Christ on our lives. Following Jesus isn’t that we simply slow down the frenetic pace and squeeze in the extra margin here and there. It is finding whole new ways of being.

Three things I tried this year, inspired by John Mark Comer’s book The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry, were:

For about two months, I turned my smartphone to greyscale. It made me want to look at things less and spent far less time mindlessly scrolling.
I became aware of how I have been shaped by the pattern of consumerism and chose to try to borrow and barter before buying.

Consider how I have been shaped by a culture of competition rather than a heart of compassion. Are they ways that I am comparing myself to others forming me toward compassion?

What could ‘new ways of being’ look like for you? I look forward to sharing my discoveries soon.

New Way of Being